Picky brides on a rejecting spree

When Rakhi Sawant gets to be choosy about her var and make her demands known on national television, can aam vadhus be left far behind? Ask forlorn, “eligible” men in Hyderabad and they’ll tell you their sob stories. Lately, their quest for matrimonial bliss has been nothing less than a nightmare they confess, what with prospective brides rejecting them one after the other.
Reasons for rejection range from “your nose is too bulbous!” to “I don’t like where you live”. The ladies, who claim that they are as picky in the marriage market as they would be if they went “shopping” argue that love may be blind, but with arranged marriages, one might as well be choosy.
Sravani Reddy, an HR executive, recounts her “groom picking” sessions with much delight. “I know I want to settle down before I turn 28, so I told my parents we can start looking for a match. The whole process has been nothing short of a chaotic experience. No one has stable jobs and the ones who do are really boring. I can’t have a decent conversation with them. If I’m going to pick someone I will spend my entire life with, I’d rather pick the best. I’ve turned down 25 profiles in just three weeks and I’m still counting. Thankfully, my parents are supportive and want me to be happy.”
To avoid being a “bride reject”, you can work on your gift of the gab, but you’re plain unfortunate if your genetic make-up isn’t in your favour. Nisha K., an employee of ICICI in the city, recently turned down a match because the prospective groom’s nose wasn’t to her liking. “I always had an aversion to bulbous noses since it runs in my family. Fortunately, that nose skipped a generation and I can boast of a nice nose. When my parents finalised a suitor for me, to my horror, the groom had a big, plump excuse of a nose and I just had to refuse. I can’t risk my kids having that feature,” she says candidly.
You can never be too careful when you are making a “life-altering” decision. And like any other picky “shopper”, Malathi Naidu, a freelance web designer too had a lot of issues with her prospective groom. “He stayed in some godforsaken area near Ghatkesar where there was no civilisation. I work in Hitech City. I asked him if we can move out of the house after marriage and live closer to the city. But he said that he didn’t want to move out of his ancestral house, so I called off the wedding. Why should I compromise when I’m getting married only once?” exclaims Malathi.
Marriage bureaus in the city lament that they have to deal with this “compromise” argument every single time they attempt to find a bride for their male clients. Darshan Kapoor of Deccan Marriages, says, “It’s next to impossible to convince girls these days as they find fault with everyone. A minimum of 200 profiles are scrutinised before a decision is made.”
Gourav Rakshit, business head, Shaadi.com, couldn’t agree more. “Indian women nowadays prefer stability over uncertain riches. Since most women have promising careers, they are fiercely independent and feel the need to stay close to their parents even after marriage. Many career women are not eager to move abroad and don’t want to compromise, so NRI grooms are totally out of the question.”